I want to talk about HAPPINESS. Happiness, how we’re all so obsessed with this pursuit of happiness and what truly defines a happy human being. So psychology will tell you this, and religion will tell you that, and then you’re left to your own accord to try and comprehend and define it for yourself.
For me, happiness cannot be put down to one single thing. There is no existing guide to “being happy” because there is no single method capable of ensuring every single individual happiness. I’m so OBSESSED with reading about happiness because it’s intriguing. It intrigues me that people think spending $29.95 on a book, titled “A happier you” will make you happy or that there is some “process” to retrieving “it”.
I paid the $29.95, I read the book, why aren’t I happy? I don’t understand, should I read it again? Did I miss something? Is this a series????
Dear soul, go back to your fifty shades of grey (if it makes you happy). Nobody ever found happiness and self fulfillment while flicking through the pages of a “how to” guide, and if they assure you they did, I assure you it was purely psychological. The mind is a powerful thing. You’ll believe something ridiculous if you, yourself, really want to.
When seeking happiness we’re seeking something only we can give ourselves. We’re seeking our own fulfillment, our own approval, and our own aspirations – whether we acknowledge it or not. We might think we base our happiness around other people, and to certain extents I agree we do. But a happy person is someone who is happy within themselves.
The truth is nobody knows how to make you happy, but you. Sure people make us happy, temporarily, momentarily. People’s company makes our day a little brighter, or a little better. But in truth, it all comes down to you as an individual. Certain happenings will make you smile, make you feel giddy and re-assured, but once the high wears off, you need to be able to feel happy within yourself.
So here comes the irony, because my whole thought process on the subject of “happiness” stemmed this morning from a little quote I read in a book. A little book I got given for Christmas titled, “The happiest moments are often those right in front of us”. I TOLD YOU I WAS OBSESSED. There is no denial here.
But regardless of my infatuations, the quote read a little something like this:
“Don’t ever wait until you have all your ducks in a row before you begin to enjoy life. Every moment is an opportunity for happiness. Don’t ever wait one day to be happy. Happiness is waiting for you now.”
So while the duck reference had me thrown for a while, I found the essence of the quote so beautifully honest and true that it was almost daunting. I hear so many people say, “I will be happy when I have this” or “I will be happy once I have my degree or achieve this”, and I can’t help but sit their, pull a judgmental bitch face, scratch my head and wonder why the bloody hell they’re not happy now? There is no compromising your happiness, it’s not something you wait on, it’s not an occasion or a circumstance, for me.
I’m one of those crazy nutters who insists on only doing what makes you happy (within reason of course). If he doesn’t make you happy, leave him. If your job is giving you grief, find a replacement. If you’re not happy with yourself, make a change, but do it NOW.
We prolong it so much, we make something that is so vital a compromise, and for what? I find it so frustrating and infuriating, hearing people whinge about things that make them “unhappy”, like they’ve pinpointed it down to a tee, yet they do nothing about it.
You’re not entitled to anything and the universe owes you nothing. Self fulfillment isn’t a golden ticket, and if it was, you would get no gratification or satisfaction knowing you had done absolutely nothing to achieve and obtain what you wanted.
I’m so guilty of this myself. I’ve waited on certain people to make me happy, certain changes and certain achievements to make me feel whole. But the truth is everything is so temporary and we live in a world where everything is made so disposable. You need to be able to depend on yourself.
Stop waiting on a miracle to get you where you want to be. Whatever it is that’s going to make you “so happy” or at least “happy” today, go do it.